12/31/10

Look at Your Year, Look at Your Choices: The 2010 Yearbook

Happy New Year's Eve, how you ~durrin~ everybody? We hope you're ready for one last stunning, flawless, amazing, most likely to snatch the wig off your favorite edition of "Look at Your Year, Look at Your Choices," the Majak Kingdom's pithy take on all things 2010. Already this week we've delved knee deep into some of the biggest scandals of 2010, taken on some of the biggest flops to land with a resounding thud this year, organized our own political rally in honor of the cray cray year of politics in 2010 and yesterday we found ourselves taking on all of the guilty pleasure shows we secretly DV-R and tunes we jam out to in our car. Whew, this blogger is TIRED but if you thought we had run out of things to bitch about this year, you are sadly mistaken.

Today we're listing some of the things that made us go TOTES FAVE, the things that made us scream OH HELL NAY, the events/places/things that got SIDE EYES of epic proportions and all of the I CAN'T EVEN moments you can post a YouTube rant about as we've created our own yearbook for the 2010. Who was the class clown of 2010?  Who had the worst case of Senioritis?



Put on your party hat and pop that bottle of cheap ass sparkling wine you got from Kwik Trip as we break it down one more time for you.

First up, we dub our Prom King and Queen of the Year. There were so many dudes who rocked our world in 2010 including Joel McHale, who continued to pull double duty on both NBC's "Community" and "The Soup"


We also adored everything about new addition to "Glee" Darren Criss


But the Prom King of the Year had to be Mr. Leonardo DiCaprio. With both "Shutter Island" and "Inception," Leonardo stared in two films that showed there was room amongst all the schlock for intelligent, interesting and adult films. BUT enough of that, let's flashback to his crappy younger days on "Growing Pains" for our mandatory clip.


Our Prom Queen of 2010 is the one, the only, the Harajuku Barbie herself, Nicki Minaj:


Making everybody's singles that much hotter, Minaj busted out of the mixtape scene in 2010 and promptly snatched Lil Kim's lacefront, set it on fire and buried it next to the remains of her career. A kooky blend of Lil Wayne and Busta Rhymes antics married with a cartoon-y sexual persona, Nicki Minaj was probably the most sought after featured artist of the year.

And if you don't like our choice:


Next up, the class clown of 2010. Do we really even have to question who it was?

With the help of the Gregory Brothers and copious amounts of AutoTune, Antoine Dodson helped show us the lighter side of attempted sexual assault. Bravo. Below, his live performance on the BET Hip Hop Awards if you missed it:

We'll give Antoine credit for beating that dead horse like he was Chris Brown in a limo and making enough paper to get him and his family out the hood.

Next up, "Most Likely to Have Severe Neck Problems By Puberty" goes to Willow Smith and her neck-breaking 2010 hit "Whip My Hair."

Bonus, Internet sensation Glozell helps break down the lyrics for us

Next, "Most Likely To Get Hair Styling Ideas From the Kool-Aid Aisle" winner Rihanna and her tune "Only Girl in the World"

We follow this up with "Most Likely to Spend Free Time Listening to Records While Wearing a Cotton Shirt Dress" Zooey Deschanel and M. Ward with their tune "In the Sun"

Bonus, Noel Kristi's dead-on impersonation of Zooey Deschanel

Next, "Most Likely To Never Eat Truffle Fries Again With a NY Times Reporter" M.I.A. and her tune "Born Free"

"Most Likely to Give Us Our Favorite Sexy Winking GIF of the Year": "Inception" actor Tom Hardy


"Most Likely to Split Her Time Between Writing Songs about Ponies and Her Famous Exes": Taylor Swift

"Most Likely Our Favorite GIF of the Year"


"Band Most Likely to be Played While We're Jumping Off a Building to Get Into Our Skinny Jeans": The Magic Kids

"Most Likely to Have To Remind People She Had an Album Come Out in 2010": Kelis

"Most Likely To Have To Tell People She DIDN'T Have An Album of New Material Out in 2010": Beyonce

"Least Likely Video to be on Fred Phelp's YouTube Faves": Cazwell's "Ice Cream Truck"


"Most Likely to Make Us Cry Like a Vikings or Packers Fan During This Past Season": Corrine Bailey Rae and her tune "I'd Do It All Again."



"Most Likely to be Considered the Song of the Year": Cee-Lo Green's "Fuck You"

"Most Likely to be Favorite Album of the Year": Janelle Monae's "The ArchAndroid"

"Most Likely to be Favorite Video of the Year": Mark Ronson "Somebody to Love"

"Character We Most Want to Spend Time With in Real Life": Leslie Knope, "Parks and Recreation"

"YouTube Video Most Likely to Inspire a Blog Feature Title": "Sassy Gay Friend"

"Most Likely to be Stunning, Flawless, Amazing, Better Readers Than Your Favorite"
You! We'd like to thank every one of you for reading the Majak Kingdom blog and like to shout out incredibly loyal readers Tom, Emily, Steve, Seth and Grant.



We hope everybody has a fabulous New Year's Eve. And for one last time for 2010, we wish you love, peace and downloads! BRING ON THE DANCERS!








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