Nick of Time: A Well-Rounded Education With Commercial Breaks

Welcome to the first entry in our week devoted to our favorite programming of the Nickelodeon network. Today we tackle the stunning, flawless, amazing, better than your local PBS station, etc. children's programming that fell under the logo of Nick Jr.

Oh Nick Jr., what a wonderful invention you were. Who needed a functional education system or proper parenting when we had you to teach us how to count, spell and give us some semblance of a moral compass. Though there was always criticism of how television was babysitting children, we'll give Nick Jr. credit that at least it didn't steal from our parents' liquor cabinets like some of the teenage babysitters we had while growing up.

Choosing our favorite Nick Jr. shows was no easy task since there were a ton of programs of equally awesome quality that we used to sit parked in front of while eating Cinnamon Toast Crunch and literally drinking gallons of orange juice. But we here at the Majak Kingdom have narrowed it down to the few, the proud, and the most skiamarink.

Up first, we salute the HBIC of Nick Jr. and her residence of fabulousness, Eureeka's Castle.

What was there NOT to love about this show? You got a whole crew of crazies living together in a wind-up castle with witch-in-training Eureeka, blind-ass Batley who could barely fly, the Moat Twins, and of course Magellan the dragon who had some serious issues in regards to his tail.

Given how Nickelodeon likes to slip in adult humor into ALL of their programming, we're really having a difficult time believing that Magellan and his large tail "having a mind of its own" wasn't some sort of Freudian joke.

You think we're kidding? A clip from Rocko's Modern Life all about an overbooked hotel and a "premature departure"

Next up, one of our all-time favorites, The World of David Gnome

There were so many things that we loved about this show, but mostly we loved the theme song. We loved that period of time in the late 80s and early 1990s where pretty much every theme song sounded like it could've been written by Christopher Cross.

We're pretty sure if David the Gnome existed, he'd probably be spending most of his days saying:

Next up, the Cosbys of children's television, Gullah Gullah Island

We loved a lot about this show from the design/feel of the show (even though cheap ass Nickelodeon totally repurposed the Clarissa Explains It All house to make room for Gullah Gullah which might be some subversive commentary on white flight, who knows) to the fact we saw representation in ourselves when we watched it (referring to the Black family, not the tadpole) and the, in retrospect, cringeworthy attempts to be slightly "hip."

Next up, our favorite cartoon from the Nick Jr. block of Nickelodeon, the one that was snatching other cartoons bald-headed with its awesomeness: The Muppet Babies.

The Muppets highlighted a lot of what made shows on Nickelodeon great: a great sense of playfulness that balanced the needs of the children watching while throwing out jokes that their parents could enjoy on a different level. Below, The Muppet Babies go adventuring for pyramids and end up in a very special Pyramid.

Bonus: the first appearance of the Muppet Babies in the film The Muppets Take Manhattan

Well we have had a great time going back in time. But it's time for our chocolate milk and graham cracker snack and a good nap. We end this edition of Nick of Time in the most appropriate fashion we can think of.

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