Oh Glee, we will give you credit for your season premiere and the fact you spent the first few minutes in a meta-fueled opening detailing all the various reasons why people like us could dislike your show: the abundance of Autotune, Mr. Shuster's need to rap, the questionable song choices. Snaps for that, granted what would be even better is if the show went about and truly fixed those problems instead of just joking about it.
We here at Mixtape would hate to not be part of a cultural phenom so we tuned to give another chance and for the most part were pleasantly surprised. Still not nearly as amazing as the pilot episode, but not as mind-numbingly self-serving as the episode where the Glee club joins a deaf glee club to sing a tune together (I FUCKING KNOW RIGHT). We are a little concerned that the whole cast, save a few, were apparently put on strenuous diets over the summer. Like the girl who plays Rachel Berry went from looking like a younger Idina Menzel to a stick figure with a big pair of lips, which reading that big is probably a pretty dead-on description of Idina too.
Plus, we still marvel at a such a show that is able to, without even the slightest trace of irony, to maintain a "This is for the outsiders, come together" pose while simultaneously being a beyond crass money making machine in various forms from soundtracks to even a fictional autobiography of Jane Lynch's character. It's cold hard commercialism at its finest and most harmonic level.
So in honor of the new season with episodes centered around Britney Spears and Rocky Horror Picture Show, we have some ideas of some artists that they should attempt.
First up, we think they should try Prince, simply because we know it's never going to happen. Prince is too busy dismissing the internet as being over with and stomping door-to-door with Diamond and Pearl for Jehovah. We'd really like it simply because of all the hilarious possibility like Kurt and his future love interest singing "You Got the Look to each other."
Or Rachel Berry fantasizing about her future with Finn Hudson like "Let's Pretend We're Married."
Another artist that would be fun if they tackled the songbook of Australian pop princess Kylie Minogue. The friendship between Sue and Will seems tailor-made for "Better the Devil You Know."
Elsewhere, we could see a sad moment with Artie pining for Tina while singing this reworked version of "I Should Be So Lucky"
Lastly, they have featured the Rolling Stones once in their first season but we figure if the Rolling Stones can withstand Susan Boyle and Britney Spears covering them, they pretty much can survive anything.
And we wouldn't choose obvious things like "Satisfaction" or "Sympathy for the Devil" or "Wild Horses."
Since Glee has no problems removing the socio-political messages from songs in order to fit a plotline, why not do "Street Fighting Man" in reference to their Slushie wars.
And they should do "Sister Morphine" just because we just want to know what Autotune would do to this tune.
Bonus, Glee's take on Empire State of Mind.