"But I don't want to go among mad people," Alice remarked.
"Oh, you can't help that," said the Cat: "we're all mad here. I'm mad. You're mad."
"How do you know I'm mad?" said Alice.
"You must be," said the Cat, "or you wouldn't have come here."
Alice and the Cheshire Cat, Alice in Wonderland
Oh Oktoberfest, it's your closing weekend which always fills us with conflicted feelings here at the Mixtape. Oktoberfest is that magical time of year where suspenders become fashionable, functional alcoholism is socially acceptable, and watching a parade can be considered a contact sport. As a native of La Crosse, Oktoberfest is old Bavarian hat to us at this point, but every year we're consistently amazed at all the beer-soaked, sour krat stuffed Tom Fuckery that can happen in just one week's time in our humble little community. So in honor of Oktoberfest's closing weekend, we put together a mixtape that highlights some of the madness of the festival.
First up, we have Kelis and her tune with ex-husband/rapper Nas, "In Public" off her Tasty album.
During Oktoberfest, a whole assortment of behind the doors bad behavior seem to tumble out into the streets whether it's peeing on Fifth Street, puking on Third, or receiving some lower body attention on Jay Street.
"We just walked past a guy getting a handjob," my friend Steven called to tell me in the midst of the opening weekend of Oktoberfest. "Not in an alley but like on the sidewalk in front of a bar."
"It's 6:30 p.m.," I said, looking at the clock on my cellphone. "It's not even dark out. I thought the freaks only were supposed to come out at night."
Next up, we flashback to high school with Chumbawamba and their ode to partying in the bars, "Tubthumping"
People don't just get drunk at Oktoberfest. They get transcendent.
"Do you even know where you're at?" I asked a drunk guy on Saturday, who had misguidedly tried to cram a large body into medium lederhosen and found himself waiting for a safe ride on the corner of Shitface and Alcohol Poisoning.
"Me? I am in heaven right now," he drunkenly slurred.
Then he puked down the front of his shirt.
"You read my mind," I said.
Next up, Rihanna's song "Photographs" featuring Will.I.Am off her album Rated R.
Scrolling through all the Facebook albums of friends, we'd think it'd be sort of an amazing scientific study find out how many future political careers will be ended because of the drunken photographic evidence from this one week. Granted if Sarah Palin can overcome being, well, Sarah Palin, we suppose anybody can be a viable political figure, even if they have a whole album dedicated to "Boobtoberfest."
Lastly, we leave you with the sweet harmonies of the Andrew Sisters and their take on the "Beer Barrel Polka."
We may taken the piss out of Oktoberfest, but it does hold special bit of affection for us. We remember the days of being at Central High School and doing the polka during assemblies around this time of year, ditching class to watch the tapping of the golden keg. Or returning in college to lead your friends down the rabbit hole into the chaos of Oktoberfest. And there is nothing quite like parking your car and making your way downtown and turning that corner and seeing the swarms of folks having a good time. Even without a drop of booze, you feel drunk just off the good vibrations.
So enough with our yammering, we, and you, have the rest of Oktoberfest to enjoy.