The Majak Mixtape - So Happy I Could Mixtape, Part Two

Morning Mixtapers! Welcome to another stunning, flawless, amazing, SNATCHING THE CHAMPAGNE FLUTE from your favorite edition of the Majak Mixtape, where pop culture goes when its lost its judging position on "The X-Factor." Happy Friday Mixtapers! We're back with part two of our extravaganza eleganza in tribute to the one year anniversary of the Majak Mixtape. Could we have done this all in one Mixtape? Probably. But if Oprah can convert the whole United Center into one big love-athon and broadcast that for two days, we figure we can stretch out this look back at the Mixtape as well. What we lack in special guest stars, we more than make up in bitchy commentary and links to YouTube. And really? Isn't that all we need at the beginning of a Memorial Day weekend? Exactly. But before we talk about some of our favorite songs and videos from our first year as mixtaper du jour for "The Second Supper," it's time for us to what?

Somewhere, Christina Aguilera is laughing her ass off while reapplying her red lipstick for the 12th time that morning as Simon Cowell's attempt to bring his mega-hit "The X-Factor" to the United States continues to be making waves for all the wrong reasons. With "The Voice" on NBC doing so well, you just know that Cowell is trying to do everything that is possible to ensure that "The X-Factor" is a hit and apparently one way he is doing it is dropping Girls Aloud singer Cheryl Cole from the panel, even though she already filmed auditions in Los Angeles. According to TMZ, the chief reason was because producers were worried that people weren't going to understand her accent.

Really? We don't really buy that since Cheryl Cole's accent isn't a new thing. It's not like she's Madonna, and it changed mid-flight over the Atlantic Ocean. It must sting a lot for Ms. Cole to not only be ousted as a judge but replaced by Nicole "Every Single is My Debut Solo Single" Scherzinger of Pussycat Dolls fame. Nicole had originally been signed on to just host the program but now will be added to the panel along with Paula Abdul, L.A. Reid and Mr. Cowell.

In other news, there are predictions that "The Hangover: Part II" may rake in some $100 million in the box office this weekend. We're sure a lot of that money is going to go towards paying the army of writers it took to that the first film's script and switch the words from "Las Vegas" to "Bangkok." You do have to sort of appreciate the fact that film not only doesn't hide but seemingly flaunts the fact that it's exactly the same as the first film.

Also, Amy Winehouse's back to blacking out so she checked herself into rehab according to sources. The "Tears Dry on Their Own" singer apparently checked herself into a facility but not before downing one last bottle of vodka before making this venture. We sure hope it was top shelf or she's going to be having one rough ass morning.

And that's just a little bit of the tea for today! Now let us continue to the rest of the Mixtape because we so so so excited.

The Majak Mixtape - So Happy I Could Mixtape, Part One

Morning Mixtapers! Welcome to another stunning, flawless, amazing, SERVING YOU ANNIVERSARY REALNESS better than your favorite edition of the Majak Mixtape, where pop culture has gone to get its soundtrack for the past year. That's right, Mixtapers, this week marks the one year anniversary of the Majak Mixtape. In that time, we've typed about a lot of tunes, spilled an ocean's worth of tea, and snatched so many wigs we may just open our own cosmetology school for the underprivileged, okay? In honor of this lovely little milestone, we've decided to put together an extra special Mixtape filled with songs, stories, and snippets from Mixtapes gone by. But before we get to the Mix, let us first get to the tea.

First up, Oprah ended her 25 year run as America's favorite shouter of celebrity names yesterday as "The Oprah Winfrey Show" signed off. Over the two day Oprah Winfrey Spectacular that took up Monday and Tuesday of the program, Oprah, in front of a hand-picked audience, went out on a relatively quiet note, just speaking to the camera for the hour. You cannot tell me that at least one person in the audience wasn't annoyed they didn't get a car or trip to Australia or at least a copy of a book underneath their chair. Though, we suppose, being able to be on Oprah's show and bask in all of her Oprah-ness. Did the show veer into preachiness? Of course it did. Did we feel like we might have to write a final exam after her lecture? Most definitely. But overall, the last hour of Oprah turned out to be a grand send-off for fans and a sincere thank-you from Oprah to her ridiculously loyal viewing audience.

Given that we spent a season watching "Glee," you would understand that our pain threshold when it comes to Fox music shows is about nil at this point and why we decided to skip out on the two-hour season finale of "American Idol." Seriously, this show is more padded than all the drag queen contestants on RuPaul's Drag Race combined. What we do know is that it was the grand battle of White Country Singer Girl vs. White Country Singer Boy. Stirring, I know. While they sang for their suppers, Jennifer Lopez wondered how being on this show barely helped her album sales, Steven Tyler found new and intricate ways to out-incoherent Paula Abdul's tenure and Randy Jackson existed to, well, fill space while Ryan Seacrest spent his commercial breaks trying to figure out exactly how many more reality shows he could get out of the Kardashian family. The winner turned out to be White Country Boy. And the world rejoiced, except for the people who have realized that a girl may never actually win this competition again.

Now put on your party hat, crack out open the cheap champagne from Kwik Trip because it's time for what? A Mixtape party!

Gleecap - Gleek State of Mind

Hey Gleeks. Well it all comes down to this. After 22 episodes, three fake recaps, countless songs, numerous eyerolls, a billion jank characterizations and an inhumanely large number of Bruno Mars tunes, we've finally reached the conclusion of season two of the Fox series "Glee." It's been a long,long, sometimes seemingly unending journey to Nationals, but we and the kids of New Directions finally have made it to the Big Apple. Will the kids of New Directions win Nationals? What will Quinn's big shocking plan be? Are there any people that like Rachel and Finn enough individually to muster the necessary give-a-crap to see if they get back together? All will be revealed later. But first, it's time for our second mini-recap of the second hour of the Oprah farewell party.



You have no idea how ridiculously easy it is to find a whole wide spectrum of crying Oprah .gifs



While the first hour of the spectacular was okay, with Beyonce flogging her flop single in a stellar performance while people like Madonna came to sit at Oprah's royal throne to talk about how pretty much Oprah is the cause of everything from the sun shining to rainbows after storms to the discoverer of the cure for everything short of the common cold.

The second hour was the more deeply personal hour of the program as people like Tyler Perry, sadly not dressed up in Madea drag, talked about the 64,000 or so people that Oprah helped send to school with her scholarship program. We may mock Oprah for a multitude of things, but we have to give her credit for actually being one of the greatest philanthropists out there. We had appearances from Michael Jordan and Stevie Wonder. Maya Angelou also came to the show with a new poem. Sadly, it didn't reach the amazingness of "Maya Angelou reads Man-for-Man section of Craigslist" a la "The Big Gay Sketch Show." We also had an appearance from Oprah's longtime boyfriend/dependent claim on her taxes Stedman as well as Aretha Franklin doing the longest version of "Amazing Grace." No seriously, two minutes into the program, I sent a text to my friend Grant, asking if Aretha had actually verbalized any real words yet. The best part of the whole damn thing? Maria Shriver showing up to it because they filmed this spectacular the day that Arnold went public with the lovechild. Maria Shriver took the opportunity to not only honor Oprah but throw some mad shade at Arnold, much to our delight. Shriver told Oprah, "You have given me love, support, wisdom and, most of all, the truth." SNAP. THE LIBRARY IS CLOSED.

We'll be sure to tune in today to see how Oprah plans on ending her talk show. Maybe it'll turn out that her show is actually the afterlife.

Anyway, up next, we're getting our final Gleecap on of the season!

Gleecap - The ABCs of Glee

Afternoon Gleeks! Welcome to a very special edition of the Gleecap! With tonight being the finale of season two, we've decided to put a little friendly guide together in case you missed an episode or just want to refresh yourself.

Mike Chang's abs want you to keep reading!

The Majak Mixtape - TUNESDAY (5/24/11)

Paws up Mixtapers! Welcome to another stunning, flawless, amazing, serving you EXTRAVA-GAGA LADY-GANZA better than your favorite edition of the Majak Mixtape, where pop culture goes when its on the edge of glory. Over spending the past couple years just dancing, trying to reach her on her telephone, bad romancing and bluffing with her muffin, the Mama Monster herself Lady GaGa has finally released her second full-length album after what seems like the longest promotional period for an album since "Chinese Democracy."

Now, after countless appearances on talk shows and a fabulous stint on "Saturday Night Live" this weekend and her own HBO concert special at the beginning of the month and the odder-than-odd promo via the Farmville game on Facebook, "Born This Way" has finally made it to stores and iTunes all over the place. And while the reviews continue to pour in, we've decided to dedicate this week's Tunesday to doing a track-by-track review of the album to see if "Born This Way" is "Born to Slay" or D.O.A. But before we get to the Lady GaGa, we're tackling Lady O and part one of her three part celebration of herself.

In this first hour, you had Tom Hanks, who has apparently cornered the market on being a guest on talk shows ending, serving as the host for the first hour of basically the biggest, most glamorous, celeb-filled, pseudo-spiritual version of "This is Your Life" that we've ever had the pleasure to sit through. When we weren't swaying to the musical performances from the likes of Patti Labelle and Josh Groban, we were WTF-ing over random appearances from the likes of Tom Cruise, the wax figure that is Madonna, Katie Holmes looking like the deer caught in headlights she is, Dakota Fanning with a bunch of kids that are/have been raised by watching Oprah the past 25 years. Latch key kids REALNESS, y'all.

Beyonce was also there, trying to spin the shit that is "Run the World (Girls)" into a solid gold hit for herself. Poor thing. Never has such a middling tune of disappointing chart performance gotten so many flawless performances in such a short period of time. Sure, her performance on the Billboard Music Awards seemed like she spent a long, long time dancing in front of the world's most intricate Power Point Presentation ever, but it still was the business. Her performance on Oprah's big show was also hot and makes us wish she was doing this kind of performance for a song that was, you know, good. But you can't knock the girl's hustle, that's for sure.

Today will bring appearances from Stevie Wonder, Aretha Franklin, Will and Jada Smith and probably all sorts of other people who may or may not be a part of Scientology. We're sure there will be more tears, more tributes and even more things we'll find out Oprah was the chief reason behind. We just think it's a damn shame that Oprah has the power to pick our President, let's be honest, but can't get the bags underneath her eyes removed. Those bags are heavier than the dead weight of Gayle King and Stedman combined.

We'll bring you a recap of Part 2 tomorrow. Now rub that glitter and grease around, rub that glitter and grease around and get ready for one truly amazeballs edition of TUNESDAY.

The Majak Mixtape - This Mixtape Will Turn This Car Around

Morning Sinners! If you're reading this, either the Rapture didn't happen OR you're just a really terrible person. Either way, welcome to another stunning, flawless, amazing, SNATCHING THE ROADMAP OFF YOUR FAVORITE edition of the Majak Mixtape, where pop culture goes when it needs to stretch its legs and use the bathroom. It's that time of year, folks. The weather is heating up, the clothing is getting skimpier and our souls are at their most restless so no time better than the present to plan a music-centric roadtrip to the Twin Cities area. And trust, there are plenty of awesome acts coming through the area so we've decided to put together a little music guide of some of the people we'd be interested in seeing. But before we get to the acts, let us first serve up some tea, shall we?

First up, the Japanese government must be filled with a lot of Dudley Moore fans as Russell Brand found himself being deported from the country while attempting to see wife Katy Perry's current world tour. In a series of Tweets, Perry expressed her disappointed that her "Arthur"-starring husband was kicked out of the country to due to some previous arrests from some ten years ago. Russell, for his part, found the lighter side of the situation, tweeting that he was trying to form some sort of escape from his brief stint in detention but found it incredibly difficult to dig a tunnel with a chopstick. Nothing says, "LET ME BACK INTO YOUR COUNTRY" like racial-tinged humor, right?

Katy Perry's tour has been getting a lot of press lately, particularly because her "rider" aka her list of demands for venues leaked to the Internet. Nobody in the history of the music business has come out looking good when their requests are made public as it highlights what an inflated sense of self most of these hitmakers have. You had J.Lo with her all-white room decoration demands or Beyonce's demands for juicy baked chicken that must be heavily seasoned; these riders are just inherently ridiculous.

Anyway, Katy Perry has an interesting list of demands that include things like chauffeurs not being allowed to talk to Ms. Perry or ask for autographs (especially while driving) as well as her strict rule of having no carnations. The highlight, though, is that Ms. Perry requires venues to hold back some tickets so her team can provide those tickets to resellers on a the "secondary market." Basically, Perry wants to get her pound of flesh from scalpers, which is pretty genius in completely unethical ways.

In other news, foul-mouthed Lisa Lampanelli has gotten the last laugh when it comes to her battle with members of the notorious Westboro Baptist Church. Lampanelli took a brief break from telling Black jokes to tell WBC, who planned on protesting a show of hers, that for every protester that showed up, she would donate a thousand dollars to a gay charity in their name. Well when push came to shove, some 44 protesters showed up to a recent gig of Lampanelli's and the comedienne proudly tweeted that she would be giving some $44,000 dollars to the Gay Men's Health Crisis in their honor. Now, if only somebody would donate some jokes to Lampanelli that didn't suck. But baby steps, we suppose.

Now buckle your seat belt and let us get this roadtrip started!